Losing sweetheart is
not a quite simple thing, I know, because I had the same trouble before. But
after I accepted Dr. Loser Heart-attack’s guide, I lose my teddy bear successfully.
Now I am going to introduce you the basic version of losing sweetheart. You can
download the full version at www.itdoesntexist.com.
There are some main
steps to lose your sweetheart. Before you decide to lose your sweetheart, you
have to know why you want to lose your sweetheart and if it is necessary to
lose it. Does he steal your toothbrush to brush toilet every month? Does she
order you to paint white roses red or to build by candy? You can read the table
3.2 to analyze if your sweetheart needs to be lost. If your sweetheart points are
lower than 8 that mean you can close this document and continue your life. If
not, congratulation, you can go the next step now.
Now you know that you really
have to or need to lose your sweetheart, it’s time to next step: get rid of
that guy. It’s a bad idea to throw the body…oh I mean sweetheart into the river;
it’s not good for natural. Throwing him in front of a fast-driving truck is a
good way if there are not any monitors on the road near your home. In my option,
I suggest you speckle lots of sugar on him and put him near ants’ nest. Remember,
do all this job by yourself, unless you want to brave the risk of betrayal.
After you have lost
your sweetheart successfully, the final step is cleaning the evidence. You can
bride the judge and police, I don’t suggest this way unless you are the oil
king or the lottery winner. The best way is erasing memory, including yours. If
you have a friend who works for U.S. government; try to borrow the memory
erasing gun. You might say “But I don’t have friend who works at 51 area,” that’s
OK, there is an easy way to remove memory, just push their head to the wall.
We wish you have a nice losing experience. Oh, by the way, we won’t
responsible for any law problem if you are arrested.
